Horrible illness

On Tuesday went to memorial service for our former minister. It was a lovely service & it really did feel like a celebration of his life. There were loads of people we hadn't seen for years which was really nice but a bit strange too as some people haven't changed at all & some have changed a lot. What I found quite upsetting was there was a middle aged woman in a wheelchair whom I didn't know but afterwards P told me who she was. Nearly 30 years ago, just after P & I first met, I helped at a children's holiday club at the church & there was this 12 year old girl who seemed incredibly mature for her age & was very lively & energetic & friendly as well. Turns out this woman in the wheelchair is her & she's had ME for 5 years. Just so tragic.
It's really weird as at the funeral another of our previous minister's wives was telling me about her 2 grandchildren who have ME & are really, really ill & it's totally messed up their education & is a huge strain on the whole family. Then on Friday I went out for lunch with some of my new housegroup & met a woman whose husband is housebaound with the same illness. When she told me how her daughter had died of cancer as well it just brought tears to my eyes & she said 'Oh, I'm sorry I've upset you,' & then everyone turned to look at me which was really embarrassing. I just muttered something about how I cry easily & the leader hugged me cos she's nice.
I was pretty exhausted & achey after the funeral so had to have a few days rest.
I hate this horrible, horrible illness. I want to be healed & then in some way help all these other people. I wish I could.