Ouch

The knee has been doing better bending-wise as in 86 degrees at last measurement but last week it was painful and there were bruises where the wires are (I know - gross)  and I was miserable.

Sorry, being a bit pathetic here.

Pause while I put on 'super-brave I'm good at suffering face'.

Anyway I went to physio on Friday  and I thought he'd say 'You poor thing just have a rest for a couple of weeks and put your feet up.'

But no. He said there wasn't anything major going on and let's go into the gym.

Into the gym. Me who could hardly walk?

On the resistance machine?

Yep. We have to build up those quads. That's what he says. Keep doing the exercises., that's what he says. As long as the pain isn't above 7/10 and if it is put some ice on it. That's what he says.

If I don't manage to get some quads going my knee won't work properly even after the op and I'll always have a sort of hollow on the side of my thigh where the muscles have wasted and it's just not going to be ok.

So... right leg raise 1..2..3..4..5 hold 1..2..3..4..5.. repeat.... 1..2..3..4..5.......

Ouch.

It is difficult trying to build up muscles that just aren't, well, normal, that do strange unpredictable and painful things and I feel that nobody ever really understands what it's like (probably because they don't understand what it's like).

This thing happened though on the morning after the accident when I was lying on a trolley in the Day Stay ward with my leg in a temporary plaster on a pillow because there wasn't a space on the Orthopaedic Ward yet. I was wishing I'd brought a Bible in with me and I just asked God if there was any verse He wanted to give me and this one from Philippians came into my mind - 4:19:

'My God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.'

So I'm holding onto that and believing that He will enable me to grow a satisfactory pair of quads, whatever it takes.