I just have this little problem at the moment - the cast, my fourth one, is still not all that comfortable. In fact 'trying to get comfortable' is my new hobby, involving frequent rearranging of cushions and pillows and rolled-up towels. I think I'm just going to have to hang on until my 'two weeks after the operation appointment' later this week which is actually nearly four weeks after the operation as the consultant's been on holiday.
On Thursday evening we went to a Curry Night which was to say goodbye to three people from church who are leaving to go to Bible Colleges, one of them being 'Melanie'. It was lovely to be there and a really nice evening even if I was described as a 'dalek', with the legs of the stool I brought to rest the leg on, sticking out in front of me as I entered.
That night I couldn't get comfortable. Again and again I tried re-arranging my pile of pillows. Again and again I tried reading to send me to sleep. Nothing worked. I prayed to God to help me but it didn't get any better and the leg was hurting. I was calling out to Him and it was like He wasn't there. I wanted P to wake up and he didn't. I felt like I was alone in the universe. In the darkness I sat and cried with frustration.
At some point I must have fallen asleep because I woke up the next morning.
I remembered something I heard the Bible teacher Jill Briscoe say: "When you can't feel Him by feelings feel Him by faith."
It might have felt like God wasn't there in the night but of course He was. And he loves me. And He doesn't want me to be ill or in pain, I know that. I don't understand why it has to be so hard sometimes but I know He'll get me through and I know too that there are other people for whom it's a lot worse.
Keep trusting and keep praising.
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