Stressful situation

I've been unsure whether to blog about this but nobody will read it who will take offence and it's a major issue in my life right now.

This really difficult situation has arisen at the root of which is the fact that Dad's wife really dislikes me. (I'm reluctant to use the word 'hate' but it would probably be appropriate). This may suggest that we've had unpleasant words but the truth is we haven't. She's always been perfectly pleasant to my face. Last time we visited, in April last year, we chatted about her new steam-mop as we left. That was possibly the last conversation we'll ever have.

A few months ago Dad phoned and said if we visited again she and her children would go out.

Some massive rows between various family members ensued as a result of which Dad and I actually came to a better place in our relationship but his wife refused to budge. In April, on the way to visit my brother, he stayed here a night and took us out for a meal which all went very well.

Last night he phoned and said much as he enjoyed it he was exhausted afterwards and he's not very well at the moment. Really now we have no option but to go to his house. He said his wife has said she'll make us a meal then go out before we get there. Er, think we'll bring our own food thanks.

What's shocked me is the realisation that she's never wanted our relationship to work. For various reasons (like Mum had only been dead 6 months when they got engaged) things didn't get off to an easy start but I've really tried to be nice to her and felt we'd come a long way. Now it's obvious she simply wishes that I didn't exist. I've said I'm prepared to sit down and discuss any issues she has but she doesn't want to know.

What's making me angry is that Dad's being hurt by her attitude. All she had to do was once or twice a year  be polite and friendly to us. In order to save hurting someone she loves was it really too much to ask?

Inside she must be a really damaged and hurting person to behave like this and I can forgive her and pray for her but it's all been really horrible.

My family really took it on board when I told them the doctor said I should avoid stress.